Marriage and the Family
Marriage: Purpose and Importance
Marriage matters deeply to Christians because Jesus himself taught about its purpose. In Mark 10:6–9, Jesus teaches that in marriage a man and woman become ‘one flesh’, and that this union should not be broken by human action. For most Christians this makes marriage a lifelong covenant — a promise made before God, not simply a legal contract between two people. Christians across denominations see marriage as a permanent, lifelong commitment intended by God from creation.
Not everyone shares this view. Many atheists and Humanists argue that a loving, committed relationship can be just as valuable without marriage, and that rising rates of cohabitation show marriage matters less to society than it once did. Some non-religious people treat marriage as simply one lifestyle choice among several, rather than a sacred state. Christians generally respond that marriage remains important because it is a covenant made before God and a community, offering permanence and a stable setting for family life — though most churches still show pastoral care to couples who live together before marrying.
Mark 10:6–9 teaches that in marriage two people become ‘one flesh’ and that this union should not be broken. Christians see marriage as a sanctified, lifelong covenant, while many non-religious people see cohabitation as an equally valid alternative.
Sexual Relationships
Christian teaching on sexual relationships draws on 1 Corinthians 6:7–20, where Paul instructs believers to flee sexual immorality because the believer’s body is a temple of the Holy Spirit and does not belong to the individual alone. Many Christians, including Catholic, Orthodox and conservative evangelical believers, read this passage alongside the teaching on marriage in Mark 10 as showing that sexual intercourse belongs only within marriage. Other Christians, particularly in more liberal Protestant and some Anglican congregations, take a more flexible pastoral approach, judging a relationship by whether it is loving and committed rather than by marital status alone.
Same-sex sexual relationships divide Christians sharply. Traditional teaching, held by the Catholic Church, Orthodox Christianity and many conservative evangelicals, holds that sexual relationships belong between a man and a woman within marriage, while still calling for respect towards gay and lesbian people. Other Christians disagree: Quakers have long supported equal marriage, and some other denominations now bless or perform same-sex marriages. Many atheists and Humanists argue that the gender of two consenting adults in a loving relationship is morally irrelevant, and that excluding same-sex couples from marriage is a form of discrimination. Christians who keep traditional teaching respond that they are following what they understand Scripture to require.
In 2021 the Methodist Conference in Britain voted to allow its ministers to conduct same-sex marriages, becoming the largest Christian denomination in Britain to do so, after earlier decisions by the Quakers, the United Reformed Church and the Scottish Episcopal Church. The Church of England has not changed its marriage doctrine, but has introduced Prayers of Love and Faith, allowing clergy to bless same-sex couples without calling the service a marriage. This shows that even within one denomination, such as Anglicanism, there can be a real spread of views on the same issue.
The Family: Purpose and Modern Structures
Christian teaching on the family draws on Ephesians 6:1–4, where children are instructed to obey their parents and parents are told not to provoke their children to anger but to bring them up with loving discipline and instruction. From this, Christians understand the family as existing for three linked purposes: procreation, bringing new life into the world; security, giving children love and stability as they grow; and education, passing on faith and values to the next generation.
Christians hold divergent views about the family structures found in society today. Most accept the nuclear family as a traditional ideal, while recognising that single-parent, extended and blended family households all deserve the church’s support and care. Same-sex parent families are more contested: some Protestant congregations welcome same-sex parents equally, while the Catholic Church and Orthodox Christianity teach that children are ideally raised by a mother and father married to each other, while still insisting that every child deserves love and care whatever their family’s shape.
Support for the Family in the Local Parish
The local parish plays a central part in supporting Christian families. Family worship stands at the heart of this: in Matthew 19:13–14, Jesus tells his disciples to let the little children come to him and not hinder them, since the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these. Many parishes mark key family moments through rites of passage — baptism, confirmation, marriage and funeral services — supported by pastoral preparation from clergy and the wider congregation.
Parishes also support families in practical ways. Sunday schools and youth groups give children Christian education and friendship alongside their parents’ worship. Many churches run classes for parents preparing for marriage or a new baby, and offer counselling to couples experiencing difficulties. Increasing numbers of parishes run food banks and other welfare support for families facing hardship.
Ephesians 6:1–4 instructs children to obey their parents and tells parents to raise children with loving discipline; family exists for procreation, security and education. Matthew 19:13–14 shows Jesus welcoming children, underpinning why parishes prioritise family worship, rites of passage and support such as Sunday schools.
Contraception and Family Planning
Christians disagree about whether artificial contraception is acceptable within marriage. Most Protestant Churches teach that responsible family planning, including artificial methods, is a matter for a married couple’s own conscience before God. The Catholic Church teaches differently: in the 1968 document Humanae Vitae, Pope Paul VI restated the teaching that every act of sexual intercourse within marriage should remain open to new life, so artificial contraception is not permitted. Instead, Catholic teaching permits natural family planning, which works with a woman’s natural fertility cycle rather than against it.
Non-religious people, including atheists and Humanists, generally treat family planning as a private, practical decision for a couple rather than a matter for religious rules. Many Christians apply situation ethics to this issue, arguing that the most loving outcome for a couple and their family should guide the decision, rather than a fixed rule applied regardless of circumstances.
Christians respond to this divergence in different ways. Some Catholics follow the Church’s teaching in full and use only natural family planning; others follow their own conscience and use artificial methods while remaining within the Church. Evangelical Protestants often note that the Bible does not directly forbid contraception, so the decision belongs to the married couple. Christians applying situation ethics across denominations argue that a rule causing hardship for a struggling family cannot be the most loving choice.
Divorce and Remarriage
The key biblical source on divorce is Matthew 19:1–12, where Jesus teaches that marriage joins two people together as God intended and that this union should not be separated by human action, though the passage also includes an exception relating to sexual immorality. Christians read this exception differently, which is one reason divorce divides denominations. The Catholic Church teaches that a valid, consummated marriage cannot be dissolved, so it does not recognise civil divorce as ending a marriage before God; a Catholic may instead seek an annulment, a declaration that a valid marriage never actually existed. The Church of England has allowed the remarriage of divorcees in church at a minister’s discretion since 2002, offering a fresh start to those whose first marriage failed.
Non-religious people, including Humanists, generally believe divorce should be freely available once a relationship has broken down, since forcing two people to remain married causes more harm than good. Christians who apply situation ethics argue similarly that remaining in a loveless or harmful marriage cannot be the most loving outcome, and that divorce can sometimes be the most caring choice for both partners and any children.
Equality of Men and Women in the Family
Genesis 1–3 is read in more than one way. Genesis 1 describes both man and woman as made in the image of God, which many Christians use to argue that men and women are completely equal in value. Genesis 2–3, describing Eve’s creation from Adam, has traditionally been read by some Christians as establishing an order of headship within marriage. Ephesians 5:21–30 adds to this debate: the passage calls believers to submit to one another, then instructs wives to submit to their husbands and husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church. Christians holding a complementarian view see this as describing distinct, equally valuable roles for husbands and wives, with headship belonging to the husband. Christians holding an egalitarian view argue that the call to mutual submission is the key principle, and that no partner should hold authority over the other.
Genesis 1 teaches that both man and woman are made in the image of God, supporting equality; Genesis 2–3 has traditionally been read as giving the husband headship. Ephesians 5:21–30 instructs mutual submission, then wifely submission and husbandly self-giving love — complementarian and egalitarian Christians read this passage differently.
Gender Prejudice and Discrimination
Galatians 3:23–29 teaches that once a person has faith in Christ, distinctions such as those between Jew and Greek, slave and free, or male and female no longer determine a person’s worth or standing before God. Christians use this passage to argue that prejudice or discrimination on the basis of gender is incompatible with the Gospel, even where they disagree about the practical roles men and women should hold. The ordination of women shows this divergence in practice: the Church of England has ordained women as priests since 1994 and consecrated women bishops since 2015, while the Catholic Church and the Orthodox Church reserve ordination for men, arguing that this reflects the Church’s practice since the time of Christ rather than a judgement about women’s equal worth. Christians oppose gender prejudice practically too — campaigning for women’s ordination where it is not yet permitted, supporting women in leadership roles in Christian charities, and speaking out against discriminatory treatment of women in wider society.