Marriage, Sexual Relationships and Family
Marriage: A Covenant Before God
Marriage is one of the most significant institutions in Christian life. The Gospel of Mark records Jesus teaching that a man and woman become “one flesh” in marriage, adding that “what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Mark 10:6–9). For most Christians this establishes marriage as a lifelong covenant — a promise made before God, not simply a legal arrangement between two people.
Christian traditions express this covenant differently. In the Church of England, couples make public vows “to have and to hold, from this day forward,” and marriage is understood as a gift of God given in creation. In Orthodox Christianity, the wedding centres on a crowning ceremony, in which the priest crowns the bride and groom as king and queen of a new Christian household, the crowns also symbolising the glory and self-sacrifice of married love. The Catholic Church teaches that marriage is one of the seven sacraments — instituted by Christ and, once validly made, permanent. Nonconformist and evangelical Protestant churches place less weight on ritual and more on the covenant and public promise made before God, often followed by a simple blessing. Quakers marry without a priest presiding: the couple make their promises directly to each other in the stillness of a Meeting for Worship, and those present sign as witnesses.
Mark 10:6–9 is the source most often cited for Christian marriage: Jesus teaches that in marriage two people become “one flesh” and that marriage should not be broken by human action. Traditions express this differently — as a sacrament (Catholic and Orthodox), a covenant (Anglican and Protestant), or a promise made in the stillness of worship (Quaker).
Not everyone agrees that marriage matters in this way. Many Humanists and atheists argue that a loving, committed relationship is valuable whatever its legal status, and that cohabitation can provide similar security and companionship. Some non-religious people point to rising rates of cohabitation as evidence that marriage is declining in importance. Christians generally respond that marriage remains important because it is a covenant made before God and a community, offering permanence and a stable context for raising children — though most traditions still show pastoral care towards couples who cohabit.
The differences are rooted in theology, not just custom. Catholic and Orthodox Christians hold that marriage is sacramental: it conveys God's grace through the ritual itself, which is why Catholic teaching holds a validly sacramental marriage cannot be dissolved, only annulled if it was never validly made. Anglican and other Protestant traditions generally reject the idea of marriage as a sacrament in this technical sense, seeing it instead as a covenant blessed by God. Quakers remove clergy from the ceremony altogether: God is understood to be present directly in the gathered silence of worship, so no priestly mediation is required for the marriage to be valid before God.
Sexual Relationships
Paul's first letter to the Corinthians is a key source on sexual ethics. In 1 Corinthians 6:7–20, Paul warns believers to flee sexual immorality and teaches that the believer's body is “a temple of the Holy Spirit.” Because the body belongs to God, sexual union should not be entered into carelessly. Most Christian traditions have historically read this passage, alongside the teaching on marriage in Mark 10, as establishing that sexual intercourse belongs within marriage.
Christian attitudes to sex before marriage vary. The Catholic Church, Orthodox Christianity and many conservative evangelical Protestants teach that sex should only take place within marriage, seeing chastity beforehand as respect for the body as a temple of the Holy Spirit. Other Christians, including many in liberal Protestant and Anglican congregations, take a more flexible pastoral approach, focusing on whether a relationship is loving and committed rather than on marital status alone.
Same-sex sexual relationships remain one of the most divisive issues in Christianity today. The Catholic Church and Orthodox Christianity teach that sexual relationships belong between a man and woman within marriage, and do not recognise same-sex marriage, while calling for respect towards gay and lesbian people. The Church of England does not currently marry same-sex couples, but has introduced Prayers of Love and Faith, allowing clergy to offer blessings to same-sex couples. The Methodist Church in Britain voted in 2021 to allow same-sex marriages in its churches. Quakers in Britain have long supported equal marriage. Conservative evangelical Protestants generally maintain that Scripture reserves sexual relationships for marriage between a man and a woman.
Many Humanists and atheists argue that the gender of two consenting adults in a loving relationship is morally irrelevant, and that denying same-sex couples the right to marry is a form of discrimination. Christians who maintain traditional teaching respond that their position follows what they understand Scripture to teach; other Christians, particularly Methodist, Quaker and some Anglican congregations, have concluded that love, fidelity and commitment matter more than the gender of the couple.
In 2021 the Methodist Conference in Britain voted to change its rules so ministers could conduct same-sex marriages, following years of internal debate about scripture, tradition and pastoral experience. This made the Methodist Church the largest Christian denomination in Britain to permit same-sex marriage, following earlier decisions by Quakers, the United Reformed Church (2016) and the Scottish Episcopal Church (2017). The Church of England, by contrast, has not changed its marriage doctrine, but its Prayers of Love and Faith allow clergy to bless same-sex couples without officially calling the service a marriage — a compromise that satisfies neither traditionalists nor liberals fully. These examples show that even within one tradition such as Anglicanism, there is a genuine spread of views.
The Purpose and Importance of the Family
The letter to the Ephesians instructs children to obey their parents, and instructs parents not to provoke their children to anger but instead to bring them up with loving discipline and instruction (Ephesians 6:1–4). For Christians, the family exists for several key purposes: procreation — bringing children into the world; security — providing love and stability as children grow; and education — passing on Christian faith and values to the next generation.
Christians hold divergent views about the family structures found in 21st-century society. Most accept the nuclear family as the traditional ideal, but recognise that single-parent families, extended families, and blended families all deserve the church's pastoral support. Same-sex parent families are more contested: some Protestant and Quaker communities welcome same-sex parents equally, while the Catholic Church and Orthodox Christianity hold that children ideally should be raised by a mother and father married to each other, while still affirming that all children deserve love and care.
Ephesians 6:1–4 instructs children to obey their parents and instructs parents to raise children with loving discipline rather than provoking them to anger. Christians see family as existing for procreation, security and education — though traditions disagree about how far this extends to single-parent, blended and same-sex-parent families.
Liberal Protestant and some Anglican congregations tend to emphasise that what matters most is that a family provides love, stability and a home in which children can flourish, whatever its shape — meaning single-parent, blended and same-sex-parent families are welcomed no differently to the nuclear family. More traditional Catholic, Orthodox and conservative evangelical voices continue to teach that the God-given ideal is a married mother and father raising children together, while stressing this is an ideal to aim for rather than a condition for receiving the church's care.
Support for the Family in the Local Parish
The local parish plays a central role in supporting Christian families. Family worship is central to this: Jesus himself welcomed children, telling his disciples “let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these” (Matthew 19:13–14). Many parishes hold rites of passage marking key moments in family life, including infant baptism or dedication, confirmation, marriage services and funerals, each supported by pastoral preparation from the clergy and congregation.
Beyond worship and rites of passage, parishes support families in practical ways. Sunday schools and youth groups provide Christian education and community for children and teenagers alongside their parents' worship. Many churches run marriage preparation courses and counselling for couples facing difficulties, and some offer parenting classes for new parents. Increasing numbers of parishes run food banks and other practical welfare support for families in financial hardship. For many Christians today, this network of parish support makes family life sustainable — providing spiritual guidance and a genuine community of mutual care beyond the immediate household.